24 Dec Making the decision to divorce over Christmas
Christmas is a time when many people are trying to decide once and for all “Should I stay or should I go?” It is a well-reported fact that January is boom time for divorces as they reach their peak for the year. This is for several reasons:
- Many people want to stay together as a family for Christmas. This is especially true for those with children. Even if there are issues couples will often wait until after Christmas to leave.
- Divorce rates reach their peak after holiday times as couples spend more time together without the distractions of the normal routines such as school runs and work. Any relationship issues are more obvious with more quality time together.
- New Year is synonymous with making a fresh start and setting out your plan for the next 12 months. So this often seems like a better time than any other to make the break.
If you find yourself in this situation it’s a good idea to make sure you have no regrets before you leave. Divorce is never easy and needs careful consideration. It can seem like the simple way out when you are unhappy but it does cause ripple effects across the rest of your life including friends, family, career and health. I always advise clients to do what they can to make sure they are making the right decision before they walk away from their marriage.
I have seen some of my clients save their relationship just by having open communication about how they feel. Just being honest with each other in a calm and caring way can be a game changer one way or the other.
If you are still unsure about whether to stay or go, or perhaps your partner is not willing to communicate with you, then you may want to look at other ways to help you reach your decision.
Escaping from your daily routine is always a good chance to get some perspective on how you feel. Going on a retreat designed to focus on you, your health, fitness, yoga or just a short break away can do you the world of good. Once you have a chance to focus on you and what really makes you happy you will be in a stronger position to make better life decisions.
There is specific help available now to for those of you deciding to go ahead with a divorce. You could attend a divorce or break-up recovery retreat to learn ways of coping and techniques to move you forward.
Whatever your decision I hope that 2016 brings you peace, happiness and laughter. Life is short and we only life once so it’s always a good idea to make the most of it.