26 Mar Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow and Conscious Uncoupling
I love the term “Conscious Uncoupling”. It’s a fresh modern new take on an old fashioned word “Divorce”.
Divorce is commonly recognised as the 2nd most traumatic life event after death of a loved one. It is a rollercoaster of emotions and has life changing consequences. My clients often feel their life is over now they are getting divorced and many struggle to see a future beyond it.
“Divorce” is a harsh word and sums up all that is negative with the process. The words we use can conjure up emotion in us and the word “Divorce” is synonymous with heartache, loneliness and upset.
However times have changed and divorce rates are now at 42% for first marriages in Britain. Divorce is on the increase as people live longer and also are no longer prepared to settle for a relationship that isn’t working. People are realising that the old stigma that divorce represents the end of good things is no longer true. It is in fact the chance to redesign your life the way you would like it to be. You have a chance to re-evaluate your life and create a more compelling future for yourself. You can move on and be happy and even find love again.
“Conscious uncoupling” is a fresh new take on such an old fashioned word “Divorce”. It shows that the couple have taken time to consider their relationship and decided together to separate. It has not been rushed or the marriage suddenly abandoned and the decision has been taken seriously.
“Uncoupling” emotes that there are still emotions involved and that the couple still have some feelings for each other. It portrays a softer image of letting go rather than severing. Just as a train carriage uncoupling can recouple with another carriage without huge upheaval, it portrays a more positive outlook for the future of the individuals and makes it easier to believe that the future can be happy.
The softer language is much better for children in a divorce as it is gentler to hear and understand. I believe that children do not have to be “damaged” during divorce and it will very much depend on how the parents cope. This conscious uncoupling provides a good foundation to start to co-parenting.
I think it is positive step forward in moving away from the stigma associated with divorce and a shines a beacon of light on the fact that life after divorce, although sad in certain ways, can be happy and fulfilling.
Hats off to Chris and Gwyneth for coining a new term “Conscious Uncoupling” and may it be here to stay!