5 ways to cope with a break-up and heartache

5 ways to cope with a break-up and heartache

1. Quit listening to what your best friend has to say about your break up. He or she will have an emotional connection to your situation and this will most certainly not give you the unbiased advice you need right now. Find someone that you trust and has your best interests at heart but also is not connected with your ex. They will be able to see the situation from a distance and are much more likely to give you sound advice than your well-meaning best friend.

2. Stop “social media self-harming” immediately. This is my term for constantly checking what your ex is up to on social media, even though it upsets and hurts you. It is a sure fire way to prolong the agony but despite this you are addicted to doing it. Stop now! Delete your ex from your FB and unfollow them on Twitter. You will instantly feel relieved and you can use the time you spent stalking them on more productive activities that will help you move forward with your life.

3. Cry hard for 20 minutes. Lots of us bottle up our emotions and try to continue with life without facing our emotions. This is going to be hard if you are really hurting and the supressed negative feelings will come out in other ways. Some of us will party hard; others will lose ourselves in work or take up drinking excessively. Allow yourself to let go for a short burst of time and allow the tears to flow. You will be amazed at how much stronger you feel when you have to get back to work or parent your kids.

4. Ditch the “Story of your ex”. Nobody wants to be around someone that is constantly moaning about their broken relationship. It may be all you want to talk about but believe you me, nobody else does. By focusing on other things you will speed up your healing process as long as you are facing up to your emotions too.

5. Flip it. There is always a more positive way to think about your break up. Take off those rose tinted glasses and start to look for the warts that were there. After all it can’t have been as good as you are remembering if it has ended. So now you are free to find someone who appreciates you – swap your exes twitter feed for an online dating site and off you go!

jai jai
jai@jaijo.com