09 Mar The 10 things you can do right now to get over your ex
So, the big question is ‘Can you cut that man right out of your hair’? Katy Perry thinks so and is sporting a dramatic new haircut and has dyed her hair blonde. She looks fabulous and clearly feels great about it too. It gives her a fresh look and a new perspective on life … but does it work?
Breakups are known as the second most traumatic life experience after death of a loved one. Even short romances can leave you feeling heartbroken and overwhelmed by a rollercoaster of negative emotions. In fact, sometimes the short relationships can leave you with the most intense heartbreak as you struggle to cope with the loss of both the love and the passion combined. I see many clients whose marriages have petered out over many years and, whilst still traumatic, they don’t experience that exquisite heartbreak pain.
After a split, you need to let go of your ex in order to be able to move forward with your life, however it’s not easy if you didn’t want the relationship to end or you still have strong feelings for your ex. Unfortunately, there is no magic wand to take away all the pain as experiencing the hurt is part of your healing and recovery process. However, the good news is there are things you can do to make it easier.
If you carry on doing things the same way you did when you were with your ex, you are going to amplify the loss you are feeling as you will constantly be noticing that they are not there by your side. So, you need to make some changes. Don’t worry, they don’t have to be huge, but you do have to get creative. The truth is that sometimes the smallest and simplest of changes to your life can have the biggest impact. You will be surprised at how much it can alter how you see things and give you a welcome boost.
Here are 10 things you can do right now to get over your ex:
- Do a ‘Katy Perry’ and try out a new hair style. It doesn’t need to be as dramatic as her new look but something that makes a difference to you and how you feel will do the trick.
- Start wearing a new bright colour. Choose your favourite colour and make an effort to wear more of it. It will life your mood and brighten your outlook on the day.
- Pamper yourself. Take some time to focus on you and feeling good. Get a massage or a manicure as taking steps to boost how you feel on the outside will help you feel better on the inside.
- Stop telling your sad breakup story to everyone who will listen! Every time you explain what happened you are reliving the pain and hurt all over again. It’s like picking a scab so it never heals.
- Instead of using your exes name just shorten it to their initial. It will massively decrease the intensity of the feelings associated with their name.
- Clear out all the memories of them from your home. Empty their clothes out of the wardrobe, put any items that remind you of them in the loft or garage for now. Replace them with happy things that may you smile like a photo of good friends or an inspiring quote.
- Move the furniture around in your home. If they had a favourite chair, then move it or recover it so it looks and feels different. You will be surprised at how much of an impact this can have on the energy of the room.
- Start cooking new recipes and trying different types of food. Mealtimes can be tricky so make some changes to your usual routine.
- Get some exercise. Find something you enjoy doing and make sure you get out of the house and move your body. It can be a brisk walk, a dance class or a boot camp – whatever suits you best. A strong body will help give you a stronger mind to help you move forward.
- Have some fun! Book in your diary to see your friends that make you laugh or to do something that will make you giggle. Laughter is a great way to forget any stress and give yourself a positive boost.
Remember that your breakup gives you a chance to redesign your life the way you want it. Take some time to focus on creating a future that you are excited to live. Keep taking small steps every day and making small changes so that you will be able to look back on how far you have come over the next few weeks with pride. Grab back your control and get your ex out of your hair!