“My ex has my child for half the Xmas holiday. I’m really going to find it hard and am worrying about it all the time”.

09 Dec “My ex has my child for half the Xmas holiday. I’m really going to find it hard and am worrying about it all the time”.

I agree that this is one of the hardest things to get used to when you are divorced. When you first had kids you didn’t sign up to not being with them every holiday, however it is part of divorce and something that you will learn to cope with.

Remember that however you feel about your ex, it is best for your child to spend some time with your ex. It is important for their emotional balance to know that they are loved by both parents. So whilst it may be hard for you it is a good thing for your child.

You have to look at this as an opportunity to do something that you can’t normally do when your children are around. You will be able to go out in the evening without getting a babysitter and have a lie in the next morning. Something that your married friends will be jealous about for sure!

It will help if you book up your diary and schedule lots of things in so you keep busy. Visit friends you don’t normally have time to see and have some fun, as well as getting all those jobs done too.

You will find that the worry about it before they go is usually worse than the actual time that they are with your ex. Don’t let your children see that you are worried as this may make them upset.

The best outcome will be that they look forward to going and have a good time while they are there. That way you know they are happy and it won’t be such a concern for you. Work towards this goal and you won’t be so worried and will learn to enjoy your YOU time.

jai jai
jai@jaijo.com